I hate weight loss commercials. Sorry for being a debbie-downer, but I despise them with every fiber of my being. Why? Because weight loss commercials perpetuate the idea that losing weight is the magical fix-all for your life. If you look good in an itty-bitty bikini then you can rule the world or something akin to it. They suck you in and make you think that you can look like that model on the screen when in reality the majority of it is airbrushing. And given the fact that it’s the beginning of a new year I’ve been seeing a TON of them, from programs to shakes to equipment to meal plans to pills; it’s ridiculous!
However, despite how much I hate weight loss commercials, I want to believe them. I want to believe that losing weight really will make all of life fall right into place and give you the perfect job, house, car, and even boyfriend along with a rockin’ bod. I want to believe that being able to fit into a size two bikini is all that’s needed in order to have the perfect life, and if I just work hard enough then I can get that too, just like that “perfect” model with the “perfect” life on television.
But I know that’s not true. And it never will be true. Because despite how hard losing weight is, it is not a fix all, and it will NOT make your life perfect. In fact, the thing that no one, and especially no one on weight loss commercials, tells you is that losing weight may very well give you a complex. Losing weight may very well make you freak out more about your body than if you had just kept the weight on in the first place.
I’ve lost over 30 pounds, from changing the way that I eat and exercising, and I’m healthier. I, in fact, started out just wanting to be “healthier.” And I am, despite my pretty recent injury. But am I happier with my body? I can’t say that I am. Despite the fact that I am down several sizes of clothing and the poundage of a small child, I am still just as hard on my body as I ever was, probably more. Now maybe this is just me being a jerk to myself, and I can’t say that I couldn’t stand to lose some more…like 40 pounds more to be exact, but aren’t you supposed to be HAPPY about losing over 30 pounds? Aren’t you supposed to be happy about losing so much even before you lose the next 40? Why am I not? I’m so busy beating myself up about not losing the other 40 yet, which would be damn near impossible in the short amount of time that I’ve had since losing the other, that I haven’t even celebrated losing what I lost before.
So friends, it appears that I need to get the hell out of my “being skinny will make me happy” mode of thinking because I think it is keeping that extra 40 pounds around. I think my fear of finding out what really happens when all of the weight is lost is holding me back. I think I’m afraid of being “skinny,” because then I will truly have to face that being “skinny” will not solve all of my problems. I will have to face that being “skinny” is not the key to happiness. And that’s scary y’all. That is increda-scary. Because if being “skinny” isn’t the key to happiness, what is?
I think for me…that would be balance. I need to find balance between my romanticized ideals and reality. I need to learn to accept what is, that being skinny will not make my life perfect; in fact, my life will most likely never be “perfect.” I need to wake the heck up and realize that my outside is not the deciding factor of who I am; I am the deciding factor of who I am, and who I want to be. I need to stop letting the idea of being “skinny” keep me from losing the weight that I want, the weight that I think is keeping me from being the healthiest that I can be.
And despite my hatred of weight loss commercials, maybe I can learn something from them. Number one, weight loss does not equal a perfect anything even though they want to people to believe that. But number two, I should celebrate my successes because you never see those skinny people on commercials acting unhappy; they’re freaking celebratin’ y’all, celebratin’ the weight they’ve lost, and I think it’s high time for me to do some celebratin’ too.
A few years ago I lost 20 lbs for no reason whatsoever. I wasn't dieting or exercising, and doctors couldn't find any medical reason for me to have lost that weight. I was the skinniest I'd ever been (but still healthy, I don't mean that in the anorexia after-school special sense of the phrase), but I would still see every flaw I could when I looked in the mirror. And I went through this crazy emotional flip flop of feeling like I could eat whatever the heck I wanted because I'd lost the weight with no effort to berating myself over everything I put in my mouth because I wanted to stay that weight. And the berating made me eat more. And I've now gained all 20 lbs back plus 20 more. I've taken up running and I'm probably the fittest I've ever been, which, really, is far more important, but I still yell at my body and say "You've been there once, why can't you do it again??" What I mean to say with this long, long ramble is that I know exactly how your head feels.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment! It can be rough to lose weight and feel that pressure to keep it off, hence my writing this post. I hope that you love running because I know I do, and good luck!
DeleteWow. I love this post. A year or so ago, I lost 18 pounds. And I got so much attention. Everyone told me how beautiful I was and how happy I looked. And I did look happy in the pictures. But hot damn was I overdoing it at the gym. I did not realize how much of an obsession working out had become, and I recently accepted that such an addiction was not something I could sustain. I have gained 10 of that back and am trying to take it off again. It amazes me that all of a sudden, I am no longer told I am pretty. And man, does that wreak havoc on my self-esteem. I try to keep to a manageable schedule of workouts (4-5 days a week) and keep my calories within a reasonable range. But if I am being honest, the lack of compliments coming in has truly affected me. I have had some great opportunities and met some celebrities who I have taken pictures with. Rather than reveling in the the fact that I've had said opportunity, I am instead fixated on how fat I look in pictures. What I'm getting at is that having lost weight at one point generated a whole new complex for me.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the comment! Yeah it can definitely do that. I know that losing weight stressed me out about the calories I ate and how much I exercised for a long, long time, and I still have that problem. It sounds like you're being healthy though, and honestly that's what's important :)
DeleteLosing weight is hard work but keeping it off is even harder still and I don't just mean that in the physical aspect, it is draining emotionally even more. While I was in the process of losing weight I was happy and celebrating every pound off but once I got within 2 pounds of where I wanted to get and have been there for the last year I found out I can't celebrate the loss anymore was still constantly thinking of these stupid 2 pounds that refused to come off even as i continued to run 3-4 miles 5-6 times/week and I eat the healthiest ever in my life. And i do have a bit of experience with that at 42yo! When people compliment me on losing all that weight I just used to think yeah but i never got to where i wanted to! So I guess I'm just agreeing with you in the fact that we can sometimes be our worst critics even if logic tells you it's just 2 stupid pounds, what difference does it make? I still used to feel like a loser sometimes because of it. So no, losing weight does not make us happy and most certainly doesn't fix anything else in our lives. Only learning to love and accept ourselfs in a healthy way while striving to do our best, grow and improve can.
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