Sunday, December 25, 2011

On Letting Go

I'm sure you've all heard that old adage about mistakes being lessons learned, but what if you don't learn the lesson and continue to make the same mistake in a different way? Does that give you an F in the class of life lessons or some slack because of mistake creativity?

I'm one of those "creative" mistake makers. Minus the rose colored glasses that means I don't always apply the "lessons" I've learned from past mistakes to current situations. I guess you could say that I'm foolishly optimistic. But also, in a very different way, I apply the wrong "lesson" to the wrong situation or the "right" lesson to the wrong situation...or I just ignore the warning signs altogether. Yep...there's where that "creativity" comes in...that is when I actually pay attention to the fact that I'm making a mistake. I tend to be that person who beats myself up for being "stupid" and "idiotic" and for generally making mistakes in the first place so I either hyper-ignore or hyper-correct (neither of which work very well by the way) and voila! I have another mistake in the making or already made, screwing up my idea of absolute perfection that I hold myself to. Not that I am perfect, because I'm not, but I for sure EXPECT myself to be perfect, and by golly when I'm not...well, it kind of turns out to be a mess.

I'm also one of those "dwellers" and "brooders." Rough boat, huh? I regret and dwell and brood over mistakes LOOOOOOOOONG after they're done. LOOOOOOOOOOOOONG after I have any sort of choice or decision to make about it that would change it in any sort of way. Yet I still dwell. It's like a bruise. You know how you want to push on it just to see if it will still hurt weeks and weeks later? Yeah, I do that. Instead of getting it out and giving myself a freaking rest, I push it back and dwell on what I could have done, how I could have changed it, what I could have done differently, what would have made it work out for the better. When, let's face it, whatever situation it was WOULD NOT have worked out for the better. So I should have done the only thing I could do: tell them how I felt and then LET IT GO.
In fact, I wanted to do those all of my mistakes (the ones I dwell on you know), but I didn't because wouldn't that be admitting defeat? Wouldn't that be admitting that I make...MISTAKES?! BLASPHEMY!

But here's the thing, friends, I do make mistakes. And mistakes are scary to me. Like I said they mean imperfection, and accepting imperfection...well that's a rough thing for me to do. But here's the cool thing about "mistakes," aren't they exactly what the word "mistake" entails? Mis-Takes? And if there is a "mis-take" wouldn't there, by definition, be a "re-take?" Of course it's most likely not going to be the same exact situation, but maybe mis-takes aren't such a big deal after all. That's why, right now, I want to make a pact to cut myself some serious slack and realize that for every mis-take that I make there's a re-take out there, and if I keep dwelling on that one little, not so terrible but completely blown out of proportion in my brain mis-take, I'm going to miss that re-take, and I definitely don't want to do that!

Here's a really awesome video that I feel super relates to this post :) Enjoy!

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