The Power of NO

Ever notice how powerful the word "no" is? I didn't...until just a few minutes ago.

Picture this: I'm standing in my kitchen and talking with my brother. He's eating an over 400 calorie sandwich thing, which he can do because he's a teenage boy with the metabolism of a marathoner or something akin to that. Then...he offers me the other one, the twin to the other 400 calorie sandwich, and it's staring me in the face saying, "you know I'm delicious with my chicken pattyness and my oh so melty cheese between two pieces of white bread, just one bite won't hurt...you know I'm tasty."
And oh man do I want to just take that "one" bite, which, as I know from experience, turns into, you guessed it, the WHOLE sandwich.

I have had a super love/hate relationship with food my whole life. I know, haven't we all? However, in my case my relationship has been more love than hate, becoming a full out love affair through most of my teenage years and part of my adult life. Yet, unlike my harmless love affair with Justin Bieber's music (no judgment here), my love affair with food has been harmful, physically and mentally. In fact, just this past year I got this affair under "control." And I use the word control loosely because it's still a STRUGGLE. I mean who out there doesn't get the late night munchies or say that they're going to eat "one" chip and then realize that they've eaten the whole bag? I'm not afraid to admit it because I'd be lying to say that I haven't.

But this post isn't about my love affair with food. It's about the power of "no." And my main question is if I can tell my brother "no" when he asks me about whether or not I want that sandwich, (which I can't actually eat because I'm being vegetarian, but that's neither here nor there) why in the world can I not tell myself no when I reach for that oh so gooey and delicious and wonderful fudge, or chocolate cake, or whatever it is that I totally should not eat? Why is it that I find it more ok to tell someone else "no" than to be straight up reasonable with myself and be like "Listen here...do you really need to eat that," while I'm standing in the middle of the kitchen by myself in the middle of night holding that oatmeal cream pie in my hand, justifying eating it because it's "ok, this one time."

Don't get me wrong, I am a full believer of everything in moderation, but why is it that I can limit my food enough to be vegetarian for a month, when I freaking LOVE chicken noodle soup, but I can't stop myself from eating like 3 slices of cake in one day? Why is it that I hold myself more accountable to others than I do to myself? I mean I'm the one who's always around myself, right? And if I'm not holding my own self accountable to something so simple as food, what other BIG things am I not saying "NO" to?